A homage to motherhood…

I like to compare motherhood to the juggler in the circus who tries to hold all the plates on the sticks at the same time...so it often feels like doing justice to all our roles, the mother role, the business role, the partner role, the girlfriend role, the daughter role, etc., just to name a few. All of these roles are involved in keeping the Career, Family and Friends organization going, which begins and ends with all the appointments for family members and yourself.

Yourself...there was something? We all know the point where you think, who am I actually? Since the structure of the professional and private system consumes infinite energy. At the end of the day you just fall into bed hoping everyone will sleep through the night.

What can you do to fulfil your own roles with élan and fun? The answer is to allow oneself to create one's own world. Time for yourself. The reactions are divided here, some say immediately "there is no time for that", others work their way through "time for you suggestions" in magazines and are disappointed at the end of the day that they still don't feel better. Both lead to the fact that the battery continues to run down, everything costs more energy and one is more irritated than gliding happily through the day. Followed by a guilty conscious, which tells you that you are not a good role model when it comes to mood.

Who does not know the state of affairs? Why is this so?

Taking care of yourself is an important aspect of being a role model. You set an example that feelings like tiredness, frustration, sadness are normal and on the other hand you help yourself to change something by following your needs. Children don't believe the forced "I'm in a good mood" face, because they feel exactly what is underneath. Guide lists are good for orientation and inspiration, but before you "work through" them it is important to take a step back and ask yourself, which of them inspires me?

What is good for me? Just because the bathtub is a place of relaxation for others, it doesn't have to be the case for yourself. Just because for others the yogi tea leads to relaxation, it doesn't have to be the case for you. Self-Care is about consciously doing what is good for oneself. The simplest step for this is to question your own five senses. What do I like to hear, taste, see, feel and smell? This can lead to small rituals spread throughout the day. Taking time for a coffee, walking instead of driving or listening to certain music and letting your thoughts wander, consciously not looking for answers or wanting to fix something.

It is also important to define your own needs precisely. For example, when you feel tired, weak or listless. What is it that I need? Is it time for my book, a glass of wine with my girlfriend, sports in the fresh air or do I want to go to bed? The important thing is to choose the right one for you, to put yourself first and not others. Self-Care is not about meeting your girlfriend or reading another good night story to satisfy others when you realize that you need a book or a good night's sleep to wind down.

Turning to yourself, being your best friend, that's how you fill your battery. Then we feel strong and comfortable again. We have gained new strength and live our roles with joy. To live your own world is key to have energy for the world of others. But this only works if we allow ourselves to live in our own world. It is worth it!

If you have questions, any time!

Warmest, Birgit Rohm

Expert in Self-Leadership / www.mediocoaching.com